Meal on me PART 2
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Posted:Dec 13, 2009 9:29 am
Last Updated:May 4, 2024 9:55 am
2896 Views
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We collapse on the bed, panting, sweaty. Not wanting to stop what he is doing, he toys with my already swollen and sensitive clit. I moan and wiggle.
He is on his side, lookin between my legs and diddling my clit and running his fingers across my swollen lips, slick and wet. My foot reaches for something to ground myself. I feel his swollen cock.
I begin to rub his cock with my foot, his turn to moan. My feet are ticklish against his hardness, but it feels good. He is seeming to enjoy it and can't figure out where to look, at my slick, wet parts or my foot on his cock.
He gives in to the pressure of my foot stroking him and relaxes and enjoys for a minute. I move so that both of my feet encircle his cock and stroke him with both feet. My big toe coming around to rub his throbbing knob head. A few more strokes and he is glistening on the head. Is that from pre-cum or ?
Wildly turned on, I flip myself so that my mouth is above his cock. My tongue,just the tip, flicks the head. Mmmmm precum...I flick again but this time, sticking the tip of my tongue into the hole. Coaxing more precum upward with my hand. Oh yeah, he is loving this!
I kiss the head and ever so slowly, lower my lips around the head. He tells me I am killing him and I laugh. The vibration from my laugh makes his legs twitch. Lowering my lips even lower against his straining cock, his hips pushing at me to take him all the way in. My tongue dancing from left to right down the shaft as I lower myself down on him. I lift my ample breasts so that the weight of them sits on his balls.
Finally all the way in my mouth as deep as it will go, I give one hard push and push him to the back of my throat! He moans, hands in my hair and his hips trying to fuck my face. My hands grip his ass from underneath and push him into my mouth. His feet are firm on the bed as he pushes into me and pulls out. His cock shining from my saliva. I smile at him and he pushes back into my mouth and I laugh at the control I have.
He knows I am in charge, but can't resist pumping my mouth. In and out, in and out. Faster he pumps, harder he pumps til I almost gag on how much more swollen he is.
Trying hard to not let my teeth injure him, the insides of my mouth are getting sore from his pounding. I feel his cock pulse in my mouth and I know he is about to spurt all over, but he has held back for so long that I am afraid he will blow my head with his orgasm. Just as I feel the beginning of his spurts, I move my mouth away and stroke him hard. He squirts all over my face, my forehead and hair. He is laughing an hysterical laugh as he is so pleased with himself and grabs the camera for the Porn Shot as he calls it.
Snap! Camera goes off and I fall backwards on the bed. Face full of cum, but tired. He wiggles his way up and starts to kiss me, deep, passionate kisses. He playfully starts to lick my face and shares his spent passion with alternating between cum loaded kisses and licking my face.
He scoops up some fresh load from my face and traces circles around my nipples with it. I bend forward and lick and suck my own nipples, then he bends and helps suck and lick the same nipple as me. Wow...what a turn on!
He then takes another dollup of his cum and drips onto my clit. He begins to rub it in. Circles and circles around my clit. Then surprises me with 2 fingers plunging deep inside me. I almost sit up in surprise but he quickly finds that special spot deep within my walls, he curls his fingers and rubs and pushes while his thumb works my clit.
He feels my walls clamping down on him and he knows I am about to cum so he stops...and just rubs my bum hole. My breathing evens out and I am a bit squirmy, and then he goes right back into my tight pussy and plunges in with both fingers again, this time hard! He is pushing hard in and out, fast as he can, then his thumb hits my clit and starts moving it left to right. Again, those walls start to tighten down around his fingers and he pulls out. I moan.
He bends over and sucks on my already demanding clit and pulls it deep within his mouth. Then he plunges both fingers in again! Oh! I nearly faint. He starts flicking my clit with his tongue and I squirt all over him. No way to warn him, he knew what he was doing. A few more pushes and we are both spent.
We fall asleep tangled in each other and nap for a while. I awake to the bath running and him grinning at me motioning for me to join him.
I can't wait to play more with my Marine.
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Meal on me
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Posted:Dec 10, 2009 2:41 pm
Last Updated:Dec 13, 2009 9:03 am
2889 Views
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ok so I am having a quick meal at a place near the house. The place is packed, I am in a booth by myself, having a cup of Joe and reading my menu.
This tall man walks up to me and says very nicely that he too is eating alone and all the tables are full, would I mind sharing?
I can see that he is a military man. Feeling obliged to help out those who serve our country, I motion for him to sit, and extend my hand and thank him warmly for his contribution to the USA.
We talk, we order our meals and I am surprised by how easy he is to talk to, like I had known him all my life.
He reaches across and takes my left hand in his and remarks at how pretty my hands are. I am feeling a bit sweaty and wonder if he notices. He examines my rings and sparks are running thru my body, I shudder. He smiles coyly at me. I must be blushing as I am feeling really warm. Not sure if I should pull my hand away or not, I leave it and wait for another sign from him.
He is wearing a ring, so I know he is married, too. He says he can see by my blushing that it has been a long time since someone has paid any attention to me. Knowing is right, I lower my eyes to our hands. Its weird, I don't feel guilty.
We continue to make small talk and he talks straight to me, as if he is reading my mind. I see him look at my cleavage, his eyes focus again on my eyes. Then, I look across, is he messing with his napkin in his lap?
Our meal arrives and I am sad to have to let his hand go, but we need to eat. We make small talk until I spill some pancake syrup on my ample chest! Damn nerves...
Now he is staring at my chest, the blop the syrup has made and he is playing with his napkin again! Not sure what he spilled, but am mindful to observe him and not be so nervous.
Finally he is bold enough to ask about my marriage and why I am dining alone. I ask him the same question. he remarked that he saw me enter from across the way as he was finishing with his hair cut. He was intrigued he says. Feeling like a schoolgirl with crush, I giggle.
Again with the napkin! I can't stand it any more and ask if he needs a new napkin. He blushes this time and explains that he is hard sitting there across from me. He said he had been since he sat down. I guess you need to adjust often when its in that state? Men, never will figure you guys out.
I am shocked that he is hard and ask if he is experiencing a medical condition from having a hard on for to long. He laughs and says that I am to blame for his condition. My stomach does flips. He tells me that he wanted to lick the syrup off my chest when it fell and he was containing himself as we were in a public place.
This opened up our conversation to be more bold, ask questions, provide answers. We discovered that we had a lot in common, sexual likes and dislikes matched.
He excused himself from the table and I could see it was gonna be hard for him to pee, as he was rock hard. I must say I was getting a bit wet myself, but us girls can hide it better. After a few, he returned and from behind, nuzzled my hair aside and kissed my neck and ran his hands down my arms. Shivers and the hairs all over stood on end!
I turned and met his mouth, hot and warm...Tongues dancing. Wow! Head spinning. Stuff like this only happens in magazines. He motions for the waitress to bring our checks, he takes mine, and pays. I sit there in awe. He holds out his arm waiting to take my hand.
I reach for it and he pulls it to his lips and kisses my hand. There could have been 800 people in this restaurant and I didn't see a one. All I could see was my Marine. He pulls me to my feet, walks me outside and opens my car door, and plants a nice, warm kiss on me, like we had known one another forever. He presses his hardness at my leg, I tell him to hop in.
On the road, we head straight for my house. He holds my hand while we drive the 3 blocks to my house. I unlock the door and we enter and no sooner do I close the door and his hands are all over me!
Kissing, feeling, panting, wanting, oh my, I feel faint. I pull him toward the bedroom and undress very slowly while he sits and watches. I can see his hardness thru his jeans. I drop to my knees and kneel between his legs. My nails trail along his thighs.
Its his turn to shiver with delight. I pull him to his feet, and turn him around so that I can sit on the edge of the bed.
He is so tall his crotch is at the perfect height for my face. My lips press against his aching cock thru his jeans. I blow hot air thru the jeans. He moans. I graze my teeth across the length of him moving my head from left to right. His hands in my hair, my hands reach up to undo the zipper....slow, deliberate movements. Reaching inside, his hardness jumps when I feel him thru his shorts.
I mess with the button. Finally his pants spring open! Again my teeth across the length of him. He is begging me to get on the bed with him. I giggle and reach for his shirt to take it off, licking his nipples and his belly as I go.
I pull off his jeans, leaving him in his shorts. I push him down on the bed. I reach into his shorts and feel his soft flesh of hardness. MMMMMmmmmm, wiggle my way up his body and he reaches between us and plays with my clit. He gasps out that I am so wet. I nearly exploded when he touched me. Kissing, deep exploring kisses. Passion. Hands flying everywhere.
All I kept thinkin was to get him naked, take him in every hole! My mouth, my pussy and my ass! OMG! I thought I would explode. He flips me over, spreads my legs and dives right into my clit with such force, I nearly exploded all over his face! Moaning and lapping he was clearly enjoying himself. I snuck a look at his face and his eyes were smiling. He was quite pleased with himself.
All I could do was tell him that it felt fantastic! I gripped his ears and pulled him closer and yelled, "I am cummin!" and my back arched and I came all over his face...
His fingers still inside me, he was licking me like a lollipop, his fingers found that spot, the one that makes my eye lids curl, he kept going, rubbing, in and out. I begged him to kiss me again. Grinning he slithered his way up my belly, kissing, nibbling, sucking each ample nipple into his mouth and sucking hard.
Every nerve fiber in my body was on high alert. He pressed his hard buldge at my swollen lips and already throbbing clit. I wiggled. I wanted him inside me. Deep inside me. He kissed me, I could taste me on him. MMMMMM
I grabbed his face between my hands and begged him to enter me. He sat up all casual and jumped off the bed, stood next to me, his fingers still probing my clit and occasionally dipping his fingers into my tight hole. He finally dropped his shorts, and the most gorgeous cock sprang to life. Teasing me, he strokes it, long strokes, and I see the glisten of his precum. I lick my lips, and reach out to feel him in my hands.
I gently pull him to my lips. Working the precum to a larger pool, I stick my tongue out so that I may taste that sweet essence of him. As my tongue touches the tip of his cock, he plunges 3 fingers deep inside me as he pushes his cock right down my throat. I moan and he moans as my throat is vibrating against him.
He slowly pulls himself out of my mouth and shoves it back in hard again all the while his fingers are diving in my soaked pussy with the same verocity as his cock in my mouth. He pumps us both faster and faster. Moaning, he knows I am close to cumming. He allows me to explode again all over his hand.
He laughs as he knows he is control. Finally he kisses me, soft kisses, kisses that hold so much passion. He looks me straight in the eyes and says it was all he could do to keep from exploding in my mouth when I came this last time. I laugh and told him it would have been ok. He enters me slowly, allowing for my tightness around him to ease a bit and I know he is close but is holding on for me.
We kiss, we move slowly, like seasoned lovers. He grits his teeth and breathes that its so tight. He lifts himself off of me and puts his weight on his knees and lifts my legs up his chest. He is soooo deep. He starts massaging my clit again and the walls of my already tight pussy squeeze him and he is fighting control.
He pushes into me slow and hard. In and out, in and out. He is concentrating, I feel him deep in me, hot, hard, straining. I move my leg so they fall to his hips. I strain to pull him to me to kiss me again, "Cum baby..." I plead with him. He smiles. He knows he is in charge. He smiles at me and says I need to cum one more time.
I convince him that we will cum together. He pulls out, examines his cock and rubs the head against my clit, up and down. Pushes it half way in and tells me I should see this. I am so jealous. I just don't have the view. He pulls all the way out again, so wet. The ceiling fan is spinning and I am on edge from everything that is happening.
He pulls out again and rubs it against my ass. Oh, its so wet there, too. I must have been dripping wet. He presses his head at my even tighter back hole. He manages to get the get his head in my ass and I explode on him again. With the added wetness and his hardness, he plunges deep into my ass.
I am panting with a good pain, feeling him deep in my hole. He pushes his fingers into my pussy and the feeling of the double penetration is nearly killing me with pleasure. He curls his fingers and rubs that spot that he knows will make me quiver.
He is biting his lower lip to hang on. I grab his hips and pull him into me hard, he is no longer in control of me. 3 pulls into me and he explodes deep within my bowels. So hot, so full...he collapses on me.
I roll off of him and onto my belly. Shaking and fully satisfied, I nestle up against his warm body. I stroke his still rock hard cock with my hand and am surprised by how hard he is even after a huge explosion.
He laughs, and puts himself between my legs again, my ass in his face. He starts to lick at my bum hole. Oh this guy is a hottie. Such a turn on. He laps and licks both holes.
The rest of the story to follow soon....
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Ray & Bubba
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Posted:Apr 23, 2009 12:27 pm
Last Updated:Dec 6, 2009 10:28 am
3011 Views
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Ray & Bubba
(Arkansas mechanical engineers) were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up.
A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.
'We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole,' said Bubba, but we don't have a ladder.'
The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts,
and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement, announced, 'Eighteen feet, six inches,' and walked away.
Ray shook his head and laughed. 'Ain't that just like a woman!
We ask for the height and she gives us the length!'
Bubba and Ray are currently working for the government....
... and helping to design the "stimulus package."
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Masterbation?
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Posted:Apr 19, 2009 9:49 am
Last Updated:Dec 6, 2009 10:28 am
3094 Views
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Procrastination is like masterbation
In the beginning it feels good;
But in the end, you are only fucking yourself!
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The Widow and the Cowhand
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Posted:Apr 18, 2009 2:56 pm
Last Updated:Apr 23, 2009 12:27 pm
2851 Views
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A successful rancher died and left everything
to his devoted wife. She was
a very good-looking woman and determined to
keep the ranch, but knew very
little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad
in the newspaper for a
ranch hand.
Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the
other a drunk.. She
thought long and hard about it, and when no one else
applied she decided to
hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have
him around the house
than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who
put in long hours every
day and knew a lot about ranching.
For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was
doing very well. Then
one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really
good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go
into town and kick up your heels."
The hired hand readily agreed and went into town
one Saturday night. One
o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two
o'clock and no hired hand.
Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon
entering the room, he found
the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a
glass of wine, waiting for him.
She quietly called him over to her. "Unbutton my
blouse and take it off," she said. Trembling, he did
as she directed.
"Now take off my boots." He did as she
asked, ever so slowly. "Now take off my socks."
He removed each gently and placed them neatly by
her boots. "Now take off my skirt." He
slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes
in the fire light. "Now
take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, he
did as he was told.
"and Now take off my thong and he dropped it to the floor.
Then she looked at him and said,
"If you ever wear my clothes into town again,
you're fired."
(P.S. - Yeah, I didn't see it coming,
either.....)
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Black Panties
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Posted:Apr 11, 2009 1:26 pm
Last Updated:May 3, 2009 7:08 am
2822 Views
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Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the world. Finally, Anna said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone.
Her immediately replied, 'Mom! I have someone for you to meet.'
Well, it was an immediate hit. They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in Vermont ..
Their first night there, she undressed as he did. There she stood nude, except for a pair of black lacy panties; he was in his birthday suit.
Looking her over, he asked, 'Why the black panties?'
She replied: 'My breasts you can fondle, my body is yours to explore, but down there I am still mourning.'
He knew he was not getting lucky that night.
The following night was the same--sh e stood there wearing the black panties, and he was in his birthday suit--but now he was wearing a black condom.
She looked at him and asked:
'What's with the black condom?'
He replied, 'I want to offer my deepest condolences
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Funny
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Posted:Apr 9, 2009 11:22 am
Last Updated:Apr 12, 2009 9:32 am
2763 Views
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1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.
2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way.
3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest ?
They Take The Psycho Path
4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It (I love that one!)
5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!
6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
Polaroid's
7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A Stick
8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
Nacho Cheese.
9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.
10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko.
11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.
12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
Frostbite.
13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches? A Nervous Wreck..
14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef.
15. Where Do You Find a With No Legs? Right Where You Left Him.
16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers .
17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog.
18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka.
19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover ?! The Location Of The Dirt Bag.
20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.
21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack , Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack .
22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer
Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile
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The Hippie
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Posted:Apr 3, 2009 7:35 am
Last Updated:Apr 4, 2009 7:14 am
2845 Views
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A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.
The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."
The hippie of course says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."
The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says.
The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun.
After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie! "
The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"
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My Tax Man
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Posted:Mar 29, 2009 9:50 am
Last Updated:Apr 3, 2009 12:02 pm
3046 Views
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I found myself in the accountant's office, dreading the tax stuff and wondering if I was going to owe the state, yet again!
I guess I was thinking that if I changed to a different accountant, I might get a different result? Hoping.
The office girl was pleasant enough. I expected to see this stodgy, haggared old man, waiting to crunch my numbers. What I saw was the complete opposite!
Tall, lean, dark haired and handsome with a hint of freckles. My heart skipped a bit a beat and I was suddenly wishing that I had dressed a little more sexy for the occasion.
His greeting was a warm, firm handshake. I was thankful for that. If his handshake had been limp, I would have figured him to be gay. I noticed that he wasn't wearing a wedding band, nor any evidence of ring whatsoever.
He was not opposed to jewelry, as he had a gold chain around his neck. Monogram on his shirt. Nice shoes. I just knew by looking at him that he was a freak in the sack! He just had to be.
His eyes intent on mine, listening to my every word, I felt very self aware. I had some cleavage showing, so I was thankful for that. We got to the business of why I was there. His fingers were busy plugging things into his computer. I wondered if he knew I was staring at him or thinking dirty thoughts.
As soon as that thought appeared in my head, he peered over his computer monitor at me and smiled.
Jeezus! Did he hear me? Did I say that out loud? I blushed. I could feel the heat rising. He looked back at his monitor quickly. What could he be thinking? Praying that this would not take long and I could get out without his knowing what my brain was twisting and turning. I fiddled with the hem of my blouse. Glancing thru my lashes at him. He was handsome.
He has nice lips. Soft looking. A light scruff of facial hair..probably doesn't need to shave every day. Light tufts of black hair on his chest. Back to those lips. Kissable lips. What would they feel like? That scruff on his face would feel good between my legs.
A soft moan escapes my lips with that thought, he looks up at me. Oh gawd! I think I moaned out loud! I quickly put my hand to lips to make it seem like I had just yawned. He winked at me. Was it a wink? Was it an eye twitch? Oh gawd, I am staring.
He askes me if I am married. I answer no. I am not married. I didn't tell him that I live with a man, but technically we are not married. I am sure its for the taxes and not his own curiosity. It couldn't be. Was it?
He then asks if I have . I go into the whole big story of my 2 , he smiles and nods. I ramble. Telling him way more than he probably wanted to hear. We talk about tax credits and my receipts. My deductions. Any more W-2's? He is looking at the manilla envelope that I have in my lap, its stuffed full of stuff.
I dump the envelope on his desk. I just scooped what was on my desk at home into this envelope in hopes that I had enough info contained that I would not have to pay the bloody state again!
He starts pushing papers around. OMG! There is a polaroid photo in the mix! Can I snatch it off his desk before he sees it? Please don't see it...He types more into the computer, is he trying to hide a smile? He is blushing now.
He stops typing. I look at him, he looks at me, and slowly but deliberately picks up the photo! Its me, of course, dressed in black vinyl teddy with the boobs supported by under wire but not covered at all. He smiles. A huge grin. He asks what is in my hand in the photo. Its a dildo, with a strap on attached. He can see it...does he want me to say it?
I take a deep breath, I explain that its not an everyday part of my life, mainly due to the fact that my boyfriend doesn't play those kinds of games. He asks, almost lawyer type questions. Spanish inquisition. Am I dom or sub?
He then asks if I want something to drink. He crosses the room before I can answer and goes to a cabinet across the room, hidden is a small fridge. He takes out 2 bottles of water and opens another cabinet. He walks towards me, hands me my bottle of water. When he sits, I can see clearly the open cabinet.
In this cabinet I see dildos, butt plugs, lube, clamps, rope, cat o'nine tails, paddles, and OMG a strap on! JACKPOT! DING DING DING!!!!
I nearly faint from thrill of seeing these items. Now my brain flickers to is he the sub or dom? Glance around the room and judging by the toys, my summation is that he is Sub. I smile. I hear his office assistant moving about. I instruct him to close that cabinet door.
"Yes, Mistress," he says. My heart jumped a beat.He gets up immediately and closes that door. None to soon either. His assistant knocks on the door and says she is going home. The files are on her desk, she will lock the front door. He bids her goodnight.
The printer is running in the background. He announces that my taxes are complete and he wants me to look them over. Totally unconcerned with the friggen taxes now, my hores R moaning! (Get it? hormone? nevermind) I walk around his desk. I stand before him. His designer pants are sporting a bulge. I tell him to be a good boy and undress me.
He does. Slowly I tell him. Kiss my neck, my chest. He does. Good boy. I tell him to take of his clothes...
FASTER I yell! I walk over to his play cabinet and take out the paddle. I see the slight fear in his eyes. He doesn't know me and he wants to trust me. I grab his face, and kiss him hard on the lips. I run my tongue across them. With my free hand, I grab his cock at the base. Hard squeeze. He hardens in my hand.
"You like that...." SMACK on his balls with the paddle. I examine my work. Nice. I see where he loved that. "On your knees!" I command. He drops to his knees. I cross the room to the open space where there is curiously no furniture.
"You may come to me, my pet," I say. He crosses the floor on hands and knees. I am standing at near parade rest (for those non military personnel, that is a relaxed stantz, legs slightly apart, knees slightly bent, hands behind my back. He begins to kiss my feet. MMMMmmm..."good boy".
I yell, "STOP!" He obeys. "Turn around on all 4's," I say. He obeys. His bottom now facing me. I take my foot, kick his legs apart. I see his hairy pucker, his balls...I take the paddle and smack his right ass cheek. He shudders. I smack the left side. Again with the shudder. I then run that paddle down his ass crack, towards his balls. I see his muscles in his back ripple with tension. I smack the back of his left leg, then his right. The paddle up the crack from the back of his balls, upward. Whack! Whack! on his ass again, both sides. I bend over him, my nipples racking his back, I reach around. Yes, completely hard cock. Its a beautiful cock, long and lean. I stroke it a few times. I run my long nails across the cock head. Precum...MMMM.
I push my pinky nail in the head hole. MMMM....I softly bite his shoulder. My free hand, now goes to his brown pucker, and with now wet pinky from his precum, I rub that brown spot. He likes it.
(have family emergency right now.) Can't finish this. If your name starts with J, please finish this story from your point of view...
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Penis Tax
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Posted:Mar 27, 2009 7:28 am
Last Updated:Apr 23, 2009 12:28 pm
2878 Views
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The only thing that the IRS has not taxed yet is the male penis.
This is due to the fact that 69% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 10% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 1% of the time it is in the hole. On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts!
HOWEVER, effective January 1st, 2009, the penis will now be taxed according to size:
The brackets are as follows:
10" - 12" Luxury Tax $ 300...00
8" - 10" Pole Tax $ 250...00
5" - 8" Privilege Tax $ 150...00
3" - 5" Nuisance Tax $ 30.00
Males exceeding 12" must file capital gains.
Anyone under 3" is eligible for a tax refund.
** PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION **
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Out for a drive
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Posted:Mar 15, 2009 3:33 pm
Last Updated:Mar 27, 2009 11:02 am
3058 Views
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Ok, I admit it, I was bored. Decided on a drive. Headed south of town to a road that bisected the area. I knew it to be a straight stretch of road. Perhaps 50 miles or so. Plenty of gas in the tank, 1 secret toy and I am off!
Wearing a little black dress, I looked like any typical housewife out for a drive. No panties, but who would know? I leaned the seat back, inserted this toy I call the wonder ball. Its a light bulb shaped thing but only about 2.5 inches in length, has 3 speeds, its a soft material and has bumps all over it. Attached to it is the cord that adjusts the speed control. Mmmm a little tight but it will do for this journey.
I do not turn it on, but set course for that road. Once I reach the destination, there are no stop lights until you reach another town about 30 miles away. I set cruise control at 60 mph, turned on the radar detector and away I shot. I turned the speed to the 2nd power...Nice...I can wiggle in my seat and make it feel really good.
Thinking I don’t want to cum on my little black dress, I hike up the dress to my waist to avoid any mess. I do make a mess, and if I squirt, well look out!
About 15 miles in, I turn it up to the highest power. Am cruising along, loving the feelling...the buzz deep inside me. I am really feeling like I am missing out on some great guy somewhere but that is how it goes. Afraid to be stood up again, I just keep doing what it is that I do. Alone. Always, alone.
So, about 18 miles down the road, there are 2 figures in the distance. They are waving their arms. As I get closer, I see its 2 young men. Nicely dressed. Military hair cuts. Clean cut boys. Maybe in their early 20’s. Chicken, I drive on. It has been a long time since I picked up hitchers. They were upset when I passed them. Looking in the rear view, I do not see any cars in either direction.
I checked my cell, no signal. I was in the middle of no where, which explains why these boys were not able to get assistance. Damn. Ruin my orgasm, but if they are indeed military I would have hated myself for not helping them out, when they do so much for us. I pull off, take out the toy. Wipe it off and slide it back into my purse. I wiped off the bits of mess beginning to form upon my lips and clit and pull my dress back down in its proper place. Damn, messy tissue...Forgot to put a new trash bag in the car.
I flip around and head back towards the men. I arrive and they are excited that I stopped. They had gone mudding down this road and they think they broke a tie rod end or something. Their cells had no signal either. I told them I was bored and out for a drive and that I didn’t mind helping. They were grateful.
They had been out all night and were quite hungry they said. I headed back into our town as they indeed were military. They were not married and shared an apartment not far from the base. We stopped at McD’s, they ordered their food. It was my turn to order and they wanted to pay for my meal since I was helping them, saying it was least they could do for me.
I insisted on paying for my own meal and as I was standing there, I opened my purse, forgetting that I had my toy just inside. The fairer of the 2 men was called Tom, he spied it and grinned at me. I blushed, thankfully he didn’t say anything. Our food was ready, we found a table and talked. Nice men. Each 25. They were smarter than your average guy which was nice. Great talks. We finished and I seriously wanted to get back to my orgasm and told them we should get them home.
Once in the car, I asked them to give me directions to their place. They did and we drove, but Tom couldn’t keep my secret silent anymore, he asked about the toy he saw in my purse. Steve looked stared at the back of my head and waited for my response. I was blushing terrible Tom said.
I replied with, “Why do you think its in my purse?” Figuring that would shut them up. Steve asked if I was supposed to meet up with someone and they kept me from doing that. For that he was sorry. I explained my situation, that I was merely bored with playing at home and decided I needed a change of scenery.
The men eyed each other and I asked, “What?” hoping they would not say it was slutty or gross what I was doing. The smiled. We made it back to their house, nice place for guys but I guess that the military influence made an impression on them.
The asked if I wanted to come inside. I told them I had better get back to the task at hand. Tom kissed me. Full on the lips kissed me. Wow! His hands were on my breasts...From the back seat, Steve started kissing my neck and rubbing the other breast. This was about to make me faint. I must be dreaming.
Tom got out and came around to my side of the car, and basically pulled me out of the car. Steve grabbed the keys and my purse and inside we went. Kissing Tom, Steve was behind me, pressing himself to me and rubbing my ass. Steve said, “Aaahhh, no panties...”
Tom was pulling my dress up and kissing my belly while Steve was busy paying homage to my backside. I must have died. Had to be. Things like this don’t happen. Only in some magazine. Steve spread my ass cheeks with his hands...rubbed my brown hole. I thought I would die if I wasn’t already dead. Tom had somehow gotten the bra undone and was sucking my big nipples.
Somehow, we made it to a bedroom and nice comfy bed. My dress was off, they were naked. Beautifully naked men. The military sculpted these bodies. Sigh....My hands were touching and feeling and not sure where one body started and the other ended, I truly didn’t care. Tom inched his way down to suck on my clit. Steve remained with his cock pointed at my ass. which was wet from his tongue and maybe precum?
More of the story to follow in a few days....
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NEVER argue with a woman...
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Posted:Mar 15, 2009 5:08 am
Last Updated:May 4, 2024 9:55 am
2826 Views
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Never Argue with a Woman
One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and
decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife
decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance,
anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Warden in his boat.. He pulls up alongside the
woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?'
'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?')
'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her
'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading'
Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start
at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'
'For reading a book,' she replies,
'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her again,
"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading'
'Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start
at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'
'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with Sexual assault,' says the?woman.
'But I haven't even touched you,' says the game warden.
'That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you
could start at any moment.'
'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.
MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.
It's likely she can also think.
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Why? Why? Why?
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Posted:Mar 13, 2009 12:13 pm
Last Updated:Mar 15, 2009 5:04 am
3045 Views
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Why, Why, Why
do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are going dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid ass?'
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE...
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you. I've done my job and sent this email to you, now it's up to you to send it on!!!
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To link to this blog (sw33tn3ss3s4u) use [blog sw33tn3ss3s4u] in your messages.
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